Norwood, New Jersey, United States
Dr Cory's Guiding Light
No Judgment, Just Love: A Veterinarian’s Reflection on the Chaos and Compassion of Pet Parenthood
Today was one of those days.
Our sweet dog Tank — the kind of dog with a heart as big as his personality — managed to pull off not one, but two escapes. In the middle of a New Jersey heat wave. We've reinforced the fence, kept an AirTag on his collar, and done our best to think two steps ahead of his adventurous spirit. But life, as it often does, had other plans.
Somewhere in the chaos of the day, the AirTag went missing and a door was accidentally left open. Within moments, Tank was gone. That feeling — the rush of panic, the guilt, the frantic searching — it’s one many pet parents know all too well. Thankfully, with the help of our kind local law enforcement (and Tank’s natural charm), he made it home safely.
As I sat with Tank after the second escape, I was reminded of a truth I see every day in my work as an in-home euthanasia veterinarian:
There is no perfect way to care for a pet. There is only love.
The Myth of Perfect Pet Parenting
We live in a world where so much is curated — perfect photos, ideal routines, endless tips for "doing it right." But real life with animals is anything but perfect. It’s messy, unpredictable, emotional, and deeply personal.
Whether you're reinforcing a fence for the tenth time, administering medications your dog hates, or making the heartbreaking decision to say goodbye, the one constant is love. And that love doesn’t need to be tidy or flawless. It just needs to be present.
Letting Go of Guilt and Judgment
When families call me to help their pet cross the rainbow bridge, there’s often a wave of guilt or uncertainty. “Am I making the right decision?” “Did I wait too long?” “Did I act too soon?”
I want you to hear this clearly:
There is no right way — only your way.
Every situation is unique. Every pet is different. And every decision comes from a place of care.
You are not alone, and you are not being judged. Not by me, and not by your pet — who, like Tank, loves you for the messy, devoted human that you are.
Compassion Over Perfection
Tank reminded me today why I do this work. Why I offer in-home pet euthanasia. Because every goodbye deserves to be grounded in compassion, not judgment. Because pets deserve to be surrounded by love in their final moments, and families deserve the space to feel, grieve, and just be — without pressure to get everything “right.”
So to every pet parent who’s ever doubted themselves, who’s ever felt overwhelmed or unsure:
You are doing your best. You are enough. And your love is what matters most.
If you're navigating end-of-life care for your beloved pet in Bergen County, NJ or nearby areas, I’m here to walk with you — with compassion, understanding, and absolutely no judgment.
❤️
– Dr. Cory
Dr. Cory’s Guiding Light | In-Home Pet Euthanasia – Bergen County, NJ and surrounding areas
Saying goodbye to a beloved pet is one of the hardest decisions a family can face. When the time comes for in-home euthanasia, many pet parents wonder: Should our other dog be present during the process? While there’s no one-size-fits-all answer, understanding the emotional needs of both your terminally ill pet and their animal companion can help you make the most compassionate choice. Dogs Grieve, Too Just like people, dogs experience grief. They may not understand death the way we do, but they notice absence—and they certainly feel the emotional energy in the home. If a bonded companion suddenly disappears, the remaining dog may experience anxiety, confusion, or even depression. Being present for the euthanasia allows your other dog to witness what happened. This can help them process the loss and reduce the likelihood of distress from “not knowing” where their friend went. Signs It Might Be Helpful You may consider allowing your other dog to be present if: They are strongly bonded and spend most of their time together. Your companion is calm and not overly anxious in unfamiliar situations or around the veterinarian. You want to provide closure for your other pet as part of the grieving process. Many families who choose to have both pets together find that the surviving dog sniffs or gently checks on their companion afterward, then quietly walks away—almost as if they understand. When It Might Not Be Ideal On the other hand, there are situations where it may be better to keep your other dog in a separate room: If they are very excitable or anxious, which could add stress for the pet being euthanized. If the in-home setting becomes overwhelming or chaotic with multiple animals present. If you’re worried the experience might frighten the surviving dog. Every pet is different, and their reaction can vary widely. Some may pace or whine, while others may seem indifferent. It’s okay to make a judgment call based on your knowledge of their personality and behavior. Aftercare and Reassurance Whether or not your other dog is present, it’s important to monitor them in the days and weeks following the loss. Offer extra comfort, maintain routines, and give them time to adjust. Just like us, pets need time to grieve in their own way. A Peaceful Goodbye, Surrounded by Love One of the many benefits of in-home euthanasia is that it allows families—and pets—to say goodbye in a familiar, peaceful environment. If you’re unsure whether your other dog should be present, feel free to discuss it with your veterinarian ahead of time. We’re here to support your entire family, both two- and four-legged, through this tender experience.
As pet parents, we wish our beloved companions could tell us when they’re hurting. But pets—especially cats and senior dogs—are often incredibly skilled at hiding their discomfort. This makes it challenging to know when something is wrong until the pain becomes advanced. At Dr. Cory’s Guiding Light, we believe that understanding the early signs of pain is key to ensuring your pet lives with comfort, dignity, and the love they deserve—especially in their senior years. Why Pets Hide Pain Hiding pain is a survival instinct for animals. In the wild, vulnerability can make them a target. This instinct remains strong, even in our well-loved pets at home. That’s why it’s important to watch for behavioral changes, not just dramatic symptoms. The BEAP Pain Scales: A Tool for Awareness The BEAP Pain Scales, developed by MN Pets, are a compassionate resource that helps caregivers identify signs of pain in both dogs and cats. BEAP stands for: Behavior Energy Appetite Posture Let’s break this down for each species: Signs of Pain in Dogs Dogs may not whine or yelp when something hurts. Instead, they may: Limp or have trouble standing up and lying down Sleep more or appear withdrawn Show less interest in food or play Become irritable or more sensitive to touch Avoid stairs, jumping, or long walks they once enjoyed Signs of Pain in Cats Cats are notoriously stoic and often mask pain until it’s severe. Look for: Grooming less or appearing unkempt Avoiding high surfaces they used to jump on Hiding or isolating from the family Reduced appetite or subtle weight loss Restlessness or a change in sleep patterns What You Can Do If you recognize any of these signs, it’s time to act. Don’t assume your pet is “just getting old.” Pain is not a normal part of aging, and support is available. Schedule a veterinary evaluation Discuss pain management or hospice options Consider an in-home consultation where your pet feels most comfortable Compassionate Support in Bergen County, NJ At Dr. Cory’s Guiding Light, we offer in-home assessments for senior pets and those with chronic conditions. Whether your pet needs pain management, hospice care, or peaceful in-home euthanasia, we’re here to help with warmth, dignity, and deep respect for your bond. Serving Bergen County and surrounding areas. Contact us to discuss your pet’s comfort or to schedule a visit.